Saturday, July 25, 2009


I have a confession,
to my most recent obsession.
I thought we were like no other,
and that we belonged together.
But other persons of affection
have caused you to shun neglection.
I did not want it to end like this,
for our friendship to fall into an abyss.
I do not want this to turn into another sad story,
my eyes are done being blurry.
I want to say sorry for all the things I have done,
I just could not belief you were gone.
I'm going to end this letter
because I can not make it better(to be cont.)

Monday, July 6, 2009


So why do we procrastinate this conversation?
When only in the back of our minds we are thinking about it?

So this is how its supposed to be a common hello and a faint good bye?
then what after our last cry?

Sunday, June 14, 2009

In Conclusion:

In conclusion..
The choice is made
the memories to fade
What happened to our love?
I wont say,what the heart may ask,
about our past and where it went..
for I do not know.

I loved you...
With all my heart,near apart,
lost in the endless dream of you and me,
only to be torn apart....

I don't know.
WHat to do or what to say...but I miss you....

Friday, June 12, 2009


All I want to do
is say how much i love you.
And when you're gone all i feel is blue....
The world has turned so many times,but it has never stopped at all...
Until you turned around and said I love you...

But what does that mean when I'm so blue....
all alone, without you....
You said you would protect me,you even said you could save me,and love me...
But yet all my thoughts are the endless nights
I have cried,because you have

I wish I didn't feel this way with you.
Wishing and praying don't get to far,
in the name of love.
It can only reach the minimum, if the stars shine tonight.
But look where we are,out of the sky ,baby these diamonds don't shine

Friday, May 15, 2009

Blue Ink

I used to think it was possible
to do the impossible.
I used to hope for a cause
but only found it was false.
I used to dream of a dream,
one that had a happily ever after.
But that dreams has fallen.
Like an angel I used to know.
I'm talking to you as if it is not true.
As if this ink isn't blue.
As if this is not how I feel, feel about you...........................


I'm thinking of you like I usually do.
With new thoughts,that you've caught.
And of course thoughts that you have brought.
I really can not believe this is true,my heart used to be so blue.
You came along talked to me like you usually do.
The world used to be so upside down everything was falling,and all you did was smiled and turned it all around.
I can not wait,to talk to you
and see the smile,that's always worth a while

Monday, May 4, 2009


I promised my self that this would never happen again.
I promised myself never to hurt myself again.
I promised myself never to fall in love again.
I promised myself to stay alive for now at least.....

But then you walked into the picture and the whole thing changed,
I fell in love with someone I could never have.
I hurt myself thinking it was always my fault.
I blamed myself for you hurting.....

But in the whole time the only promise that was not broken, yet is that I am still alive...

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Pesaroso(okok this poem is from when i d8ted leslie,which we all know was a lonnnng tym ago ;) )

I want to disappear forever,
without you,
life is no fun,
my daily routines,
my daily look fowards to,
my whole life
is messed up,
i based it of off u.
the smiles u gave me,
ur laughsnd giggles,
they britten me when im down,
i know i said stuff that unpleased u,
i told u that not to hurt u l8r,
just because of this.
i cant stopp crying,
cause im not urs or ur not mine,
i gave u my first kiss,
my life,
nd my soul,
but after a while u rejected it,
is this how it will be?like this 4ever?
i miss u,
i love u
i worry bout u,
do u love me?
do u worry bout me?
do u miss me?
if i tell you will you stay?
willyou have to go?
will you be here forever?
i need u,
i miss u every second nd day,
i cant survie without u,
but will the sun nd moon be close once again?like b4?
i have shown u sides that noone has ever seen.
i trust u with all my heart,
do u trust me?
how a dsancer trusts there partner,
i have so many sides,
dont say u have to go,
i dont want to lose u ever,
like grains of sand slipping through my fingers,
untill i am with u again,
my heart aches,
and i noe ill be waiting for u,
but will u accept me back?
no one noes but u,
is this the way it will be now?
not trusting each other?
i wish i told you,
u would of stayed,
nd never went away,
but u had to leave,
nd all i said was good bye,
when i really wanted to say was that i love u,
but now,
u dont know if u love me 2,
it was a stupid mistake,
i regret everydayy,
what bout the adage "forgive nd forget"?
why doesnt that apply?
everysecond i wish u could belevie me nd know,
that i love u,
so all that is happening,
is that my eyes are shedding salty tears,
because of u not trusting or noeing that i love u,
i have nothing else to say but,
im sorry,

Monday, April 27, 2009


I know I shouldn't
but I do
I regret everything I learned about you.

I know this sounds wrong
like I always do,
but I'm falling for you.

I wish I didn't,
feel this way
for,when it happens,once again
the silence falls as we talk.
The exchange of thoughts are no longer caught.

Were both falling,
for other people,and not each other.
Or are we?
I don't know anymore,
I probably never will.
I told you lets just see.....its probably wasn't meant to be...


The questions are building,
the answers are giving
so why do I still feel this way?

I keep pushing
to keep protecting
when you ask that question.
the only answer is............



Two star crossed lovers
with the same dream.
But with only one dreamer.
A lit candle
with a dim light,barely staying lit.
Dark shadows are cast upon them,from up above.
Foreshadowing a dark fate,
letting no light,though the darkness.
Down upon them.
No matter if the tears are shed,
for they wont show.
Only the raindrops upon their faces.
The once star crossed lovers,will be separated..once and for all..............


I once gave you my heart,
I once got it back.
When I did,
scratches laid upon it,
but I was able to polish it off.
Noe I've meet you,
and i gave you my heart,
but something was missing now.
You may of given it back,but something is different,
There's a hole in it.
A hole where your arrow once was,
the arrow of your love,has left its mark,and wont come off.
No polish will work,no glue can fix,
the pieces are that once held together slowly falling down,
into the empty abyss,(which is o so common upon ourselves)
However,I want you to have my heart once again,
but you might cause more pain...
So what shall I do now,to prevent it from happening again.

<( ^_^ )>

I'm standing here
all alone
in the dark,
I'm standing here
all alone
in the rain,
I'm standing here
all alone
with a broken heart....

So why can't you see?
the love I once gave you,
the one you shun darkness upon.
So why cant you talk about it?
Talk the way we did before,
But now,its too late.
All I am is dust in the wind.
A dry tear drop,on a empty soul,
soon to be just a memory,soon to fade away....

Done (i think this one sucks,...but o well jsut leave a coment?)

"Don't talk to me,I'm trying to let go..."
So they say
all the time.
But,not talking to you is harder than anyone will ever know.
For they don't know how I feel,nor do you.
You admit the same,but you play with me like a puppet on strings.
I really wish it was not like this,now
I wish i hadn't........................................but ,at the same time
you make me smile like no one else has...
I'm sure you are busy,as we speak with
other things,or are you just ignoring me?
And talking when there's no one else left


I'l stand here by
all of them
watching each and everyone.
Seeing them smile,falling in love
makes me think
how I feel and how lucky I have been.

I've never known
whats it like to fall in love.
But I know,as I watch
that it muse be worth it.

Worth the wait
and pain
it always is its best when its the moment,
the moment they kiss....


I always knew
I always thought,
I wasn't sure if it is okay,or if it is not.

The comments from others; made me think I was wrong...
So I just put it to the back of my mind,
until it was gone...

It went away,but came right back
I didn't know what to say or what to do,so I'll play
along,like I'm so used to.

Then it comes,the fork in the road
with alternatives and incentives upon each side.
I'm stuck with one that I like,but
it isn't the real answer,just another cover up
to this game of life...

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Notice Me

So I stand here in front of you.
but you see right through me,
I pick up your books,
when they fall.
I open doors and let you in first,
but yet,
you see right through me.
Do you notice me?Do you care?
What if i decided to disappear?
Will you notice me than,
will you continue to carry on,to your next victim...?

(old poem from lst yr)

Thursday, April 23, 2009


I can see you
you can see me too.
The shadows are creaping,
the room is spinning,
I'm starting to run out of alibis
to this heart cry.

You grab my hand
I spin around,
and fall right down.

Deeper and deeper I go,when I hear your voice,when I see your eyes,when you call my anme and when you say good bye...

Deeper and Deeper I fall,falling in love with
not knowing now what to do...........


I thought of you again,
unlike I usually do
it is not so great as I thought it would be.
The thought of you,and the knowledge you told me.
I somewhat wish i never asked.
I somewhat wish I could forget.
But I can't.
The pleasant thought of you will not leave.
But at the same time,the thoughts are not all so pleasant.
I know you think of me....or at least I hope you do.
For I know,I think of you.
But what you said is probably true..It wouldn't last,nothing ever will happen...
We are to cautious, we are both to scared..or at least i think that's the way it is.
Unless all you have told me is a lie,
or is it just something you said as an excuse to push me away from the truth?
I guess I'll leave,the thought behind, and I'll leave you alone...
Unless you want me to stay.............

Calculater[yes math inspired me]

It's funny how
we can restart things,
Such as a calculator,
2nd,Reset,"y" enter...
The common "MEM CLEARED" appears.
But it is not that simple,
to restart a heart....
Memories within our brain may fade away,
but the meories we feel,last forever.
That's what someone once told me.Someone I fell in love with...
I wish you could understand,
But I doubt you ever will...
So then,where is the
reset button of a heart?


I see you there hugging
hugging her.
Asking me to talk to you
like we used to do....
But I said,
I don't want to.
Yet you question me still
asking me if we were still friends,
All i said was :"good bye".
to let you leave...

[alt. ending]
to leave me alone
stop playing with me.
You used to play with me,like a puppet on strings.
We used to get along so well.
A perfect combination one may say.
Ying and Yang in which all we did and said.
So what messed it up?[this continues after the originall ... after'tolet you leave']


Like the foot prints in the sand,washed away by the water...

Within the waves are the memories
of love,death and tragedy.
Within the sand it self are grains.
As if each grain is a time and memory.
When you pick them up,these grains,they slip though the cracks of our hands,like moments passing through the cracks of time.
Some may stay longer than others...
But how long do they stay/last?


It's funny how it all begins
and ends.
A simple greeting in between friends.
Brings laughter and glances with a common smile,
turns to a moment worth-a-while.
From exchange of thoughts
to a heart once caught.
It's funny how it all begins and ends.
So simple to fall in love,
as easy as 1,2,3.
So simple to go up above,
with the heavenly stars shinning upon us.
But no one knows when it'll end.
So live in our moment,and lets not let it fade away.


If it was as easy as 1,2,3
then it wouldn't be true.
It is not like something you lose and then find.
It is something hidden within the deepest parts of our souls,heats,and mind.
If it was as easy as 1,2,3 then it would not be magical like a fairy tale.
A tale of magic,beauty and serenity, a place in which you have showed me.
I think I've found it,I think I've found a way to make this tale,come alive...

That is by being with you.
You make me smile,and laugh,when I'm down.
You tell me new things each day,challenging me to think...
You've stuck with me,even if I say the most ignorant things,and yet you open my eyes and show me how I was wrong.
We never know what to say,but when we do,the fireworks fly...
Yes,we barely know each other,but what I do know of you,is what ..
I love about you...


I don't know what to write,
so I'll pretend to type.
It started with a box that said yes,
to a conversation turn a bliss.
We have so much in common from music and taste
that there is never just copy and paste.
Are shared thoughts
allow smiles to be caught.
So far this friendship is a everlasting flower
the will blossom forever.


It's endless
the sky,you know?
It's a realm
the realm of possibilities,thoughts,wishes,dreams
and much more.
But I can not help,
but think of you
when I see it.
I know we are tow different people
with only one common factor
the sky.
We both stare upon it,
and see each other.
They true beauty shows
when you truly look.
But I'll never know how you truly think
For if I can't talk to you,
or see you without wishing,
to confront these feelings...then.....

B & S

There's a person I like
But you don't know that.
This person is well known,
It is saddening
I must back off.
Not to allow destruction
to happen between us.
I have to ignore them.
The feelings i have,
For them,for your more important.
One friendship does not equal a thousand with them.
So I'll drop this bomb,
upon myself.
Act unlike I usually do.
Keep hidden these secret incentives
behind my smile.
Just for you.
For you like them too..............


I thought of you
today like i usually do.
With your smile
your voice
and image running through my mind.
I still wonder,if you remember me
or think of me.
I know I do of you.
But this is my secret,
my secret not to share.
My secret in which only my deepest thoughts hold.
I never know what I'm saying now-a-days.
One moment I'm over you,the next I'm not.
I suppose this is how it will always be.WIth
questions arising until i find the answer.
In which no one will know,
how this question came about...


You were there again,smiling like you always do.
But not at me
at them.
I suppose we can say "it" is over. But what exactly is "it"?
Nothing ever happened,nothing ever will.
"It" being the unknown.
The realm of possibilities as one may say,where actions speak greater than words.
But I'll never know, for what we had,can never happen again.
Twas it just false hope,with a spotlight shed upon it?
Together we are just two different people,with different hopes and dreams.
I guess they were right.
The angelic angel I once saw in your smile,was just a figment of my imagination.
I should of listened,I really wish I did.
But now it is to late.
I fell for you,and I'm struggling to get back up.
If only you knew....

China Doll

Abroken China doll
being tossed around.
Marks lay upon its porclinin skin
Blue,Black and green.
A broken China doll
being tossed around,
Scratches and scars ,lay upon its skin
with memories left behind...
A broken China doll
left out in the rain.
Tears slowly shed down its marked skin.
As it wonders
who'll have the china doll next...

Wednesday, April 22, 2009


I see you there,passing by
without a glance.
I see you there,standing by
smiling to everyone but me.
Now I know of all the answers
to my heart beat.
I wish I could,fall asleep
where our eyes once met.
So then all I dream,is you smiling face.
I see you there,looking cute
like you always do.
You noticed me,like before
but smiled ever so gently.
I walked away,so I don't fall
in love with you.
But you said in your,sweet voice
"Don't go..."
I turned my head ,to see that
It was really you.
You looked at me, and smiled
unlike you usually do.
That is when,
I knew
I was in love with you....<3